Perot's giant sucking sound has gone in another direction

Back in the late 90's at my horrible job at Long's Bookstore my coworker in the supply department and I would listen to the Jim Rome radio show while pricing merchandise.

Say what you want about Rome, it does not really matter now. One of his 'rules' for getting on the phone in part of the show was, "Have a take, and don't suck."

And get of my lawn I would like social media commenters to follow that Rome Rule, but it does not happen.

Plenty of takes from people who like to see their profile pictures in the comments section, who may seem to thrive on the attention their posts get, negative or not - and plenty of sucking out there.

I do not have much energy to engage with people I know, let alone strangers on the internet. Better for me to keep quiet.

Things the bubble wrap and packing peanuts protected

When I went through my Aunt's belongings after she died, I found a lot of the genealogy I was looking for, a few things she held onto after a life in the entertainment industry and other assorted artwork and memorabilia. I took what I could that day, which was not much as I was on foot and traveling by train, and let my Brother, who is the executor of her estate, know of a few things I might like to eventually have.

What she owned is now in storage, and the company shipped me a few of the things I had asked for. Somehow I received more than a few videotapes of single song rock videos that I could not use, but I do have the home videos of trips she took to Yellowstone Park and Europe in the early nineties. As I watched the trip in Europe I marveled at how happy she was, and how much fun she was having reading about where they were for a guidebook as her husband played around with his new video camera.

One of her drawers had a number of original scripts and screenplays from various productions her company produced in the eighties and nineties. I mentioned this to a coworker and she suggested I donate them to my library's theater department. I got a name of the librarian, gave her a list of what I had and she let me know which ones they can use for the Theater and Research Institute. There will be a little note on the script or in the record that they were donated in honor of her. I am very, very pleased this was able to happen.

So many links, so many mysteries in the hunt for facts

Finally opened up the genealogy binder that I found (in the last place I looked) in my Aunt's apartment and started plugging data into an online family tree database. The site linked me to some other previously unknown to me distant relatives so the tree has a few more branches.

My paternal great-grandparents came from Clitheroe, England, which I knew. But I have his naturalization documents from 1888, which is very cool. The family all settled in Fall River, Mass. and many of them moved to Brooklyn/Queens in the 20's, which is when my father's parents met. They were married in 1928 in Brooklyn at a church that still stands. The Irish on that side I have going back to the early 19th century and those ancestors came from Derry or Dublin. There are also ancestors who lived in New Hampshire and New Brunswick.

My maternal grandmother's story is sometimes painful and difficult. She was a twin, her brother did not live a year. Her Mother died in 1910, she was put in an orphanage then her father died six years later of TB and was buried on Hart Island. Her Mother also had a brother, but he was shot in the head in 1913 and I'm trying to find the documentation of that event. Did he shoot first? My Grandmother's Grandmother had a number of children, none of whom seemed to live past 1910. This is frustrating when you cannot find anything, but the thrill of recovering history happens when you can match a name.

My Mother's Grandmother came to the U.S., alone, from Poland in 1893 and settled in New Britain, Ct.. She married her husband, also from Poland in 1897 and lived in New Jersey for a time before they moved to Brooklyn. I do not know too much of my Mother's Father, neither did she, so I have not really traced that side of the family.

I also have a lot of pictures, none of them written on so I have no idea who all these ancestors are, and there is no one left to identify them that I know of. I do not like lost history, so I will plug away from time to time and get people identified and noted properly. As a librarian/cataloger/archivist it is something I have to do.

Even the coffee is improving

The New Year means that my work anniversary is here. I started where I am currently employed nine years ago on January 2nd. I enjoy the work, and the environment around me. Heck, unlike at a previous employer, I did not hit a glass ceiling and earned a promotion. Unlike at a previous employer, we're not guilt tripped into our pay checks by pie charts during budget presentations. There's a respectful balance here between life and work that is usually maintained.

So here I am, and will continue to be, probably, for some years to come.

Just do not mention dying at my desk, that happened to the woman next to me last year.

Bad days and days

It's a struggle that has nothing to do with agoraphobia but it's a time a year when I just do not want to leave the house.

Another tough holiday after a tough year approaches and it's really hard to celebrate. Never know what to get my son. Hard to know what he likes to do other than watch trailers on iTunes.

Mom's been gone two years, my Brother two months, it's too freaking dark outside although unseasonably warm for this time of year.

So it's become too easy to stare at a screen, a device, to catch up on season two of Buffy and ironically chuckle at the use of a Sarah MacLachlan song in the last episode. The results are no real writing or reading gets done, let alone attempting to be social.

My Wife has some hope and started a new job this month, there is that to rightfully celebrate and appreciate.

Getting out in the crowds is difficult, but maybe next weekend. Perhaps the temperatures will remain warm or there will not be bitter wind chill to annoy me during the experience.

A week of cranky

It was great to have a guest last weekend. We hung out, ate, drank, caught up. My guest had never seen Monty Python and the Holy Grail, so that was checked off a bucket list. Then there was a knock on our bedroom door at 5AM the day of departure. Our guest's car had been broken into and a bunch of stuff was stolen. Sure, it's stuff and it can be replaced, but some of the clothes, the annotated textbooks and nostalgic items cannot be replaced. They got into my car, which I always keep unlocked, and took an iPod charger (stuff) and my registration (what the Hell?)

I did tell my guest to bring anything important into the house, which was kinda sorta done. I really think that car was a target even if it was empty. I've been looking in pawn shops and craigslist to try and find the stolen stuff, but have had no luck.

I rarely write about work, but there are changes. Not much I can do but get through them as best as possible. There is also the matter of the second one of my coworkers being taken out of the building in a stretcher on Thursday. This one will have a more positive outcome though.

There was time to get a nice haircut but when I got to the car it would not start. AAA was called, gave me a jump I thought the problem was solved. Went to get takeout, the car died again. A Good Samaritan gave me a jump. Got home, tried to restart it would not. Was grouchy all night and got little sleep thinking of what had to be done today to get the car fixed. Did not want to take the day off but had to. Called AAA again who advised me to get a new battery. Why the Hell not? I thought as he told me the battery was the wrong size for the car and also needed a bracket because it was sliding around, which causes damage.

Battery replaced, car starting what I hope is normal. Went to auto parts store to get the bracket. Staff there had a bastard of a time finding the proper bolt but did. Nice people at Advance Auto on Harrisburg Pike. Figured I'd get a new air filter while I was there. Errands got ran. Air filter in car and furnace got replaced.

Trying hard to come down from the crankiness caused by hemorrhaging cash. Maybe it's seasonal malaise, I keep forgetting I crash when autumn is around. For all that though, things could be worse.

Reasons to be sad and unhappy

The one and only time I was on a horse, it stopped and rolled over on to its back. I had to jump clear so I would not have been crushed.

I did not get back on that horse.

While I was away I received an email from my son's mother saying that he was accepted into a equine therapy program about a half hour north of us. I've heard that horse riding may be beneficial for autistic children and I was as pleased as she was that he was accepted. It's been funded through some generous donations so it's free to us and the other dozen or so participants in the program.

Why not, right?

The orientation session was this afternoon. There were a number of screaming, quirky kids in the corral. My son was not happy more or less from the get go. There was a ceiling fan in the waiting area that bothered him. The noise other people were making bothered him. The smell of the barn probably bothered him.

He went to his mother's car and got in the back seat saying "Bye bye" and "Time to go" over and over.

We waited for him to calm down and then brought him back into the barn to wait for his turn to get on the horse. He did not like getting sized for the helmet. And when the time came, he did not want to stay in the area where the horses were. It's not that he was afraid of the horses, but this was not what he wanted to do today. None of this was in any of the routines he knows and he reacted in the only way he knows how.

The horses seem to be quite chill and I'm very impressed with the ability of the volunteers who work with the kids. One of them while on a horse for the first time, was asked to put his hands over his head, "It's too dangerous" was his logical reply.

Sometimes, ok, most of the time I have no idea what to do to help my son. We're blindly throwing therapies, treatments and coping solutions at the wall - trying to find some hope in whatever sticks. I wonder who we're really doing this for. Him, or us. He can't sit there in his iPad all day, watching videos (do as I say not as I do) it's my job as a parent to try and socialize him. So I try not to once again feel like a failure as I read about all these super fantastic and authentic parents leading and teaching their kids to all kids of accolades.

Meanwhile, we cheer when my kid plays with a garden hose.

In two weeks, the sessions will have fewer kids and we'll try again. Maybe this time he'll be ready to take the next step.

As if that was not enough, on Saturday I found out that one of my co-workers died on Friday. She worked next to me and was one of the most giving people I've ever met. I know her health was not great, but this is a real blow, and not how I wanted to end a vacation. She'd been with the library for about fifty years. Not sure what kind of maelstrom I'm going to be going into Monday morning.

Working at home

Took on the unenviable task of cataloging my record collection this past week. A lot of dust. A lot of memories. Lost a lot through downsizing and a basement flood. Kept a few records that show flood damage, should probably replace them at some point. The work involved a lot of bending and peering at serial numbers. Put it all onto the Discogs online database, which is fairly simple to use. Most of my collection was already in there so all I had to do was punch up the serial number. Many of my Beatles bootlegs are on file, as were my weird Uruguayan imports.

Discogs is also a place you can sell your records, but I have no plans on doing that. A lot of the vinyl does have an assigned value based on previous sales, if there have been any. The prices do seem to fluctuate quite a bit so I can't take their value too seriously. It is good to have a tangible file of my collection available that gives forty years of my life more context than simply putting it all on a spreadsheet.

When I finished the records my wife asked if they took CDs as well, so I ended up putting them all in too. This was a bit easier as most of what we have had a bar code, so searching was very easy.

She brought over a lot of interesting discs from the olde country. I do believe we now have the largest collection of records from The Pastels in the United States.

If we catalog the books, she gets to do that, it's too close to work for me.

A few hours at the Horseshoe

I've lived in Columbus for nearly 25 years now and until today I had never been to an Ohio State Football game. The only times I set foot in Ohio Stadium were for a Crew match before their stadium was built and a game of the Ohio Glory of the doomed World Football League. For a staff appreciation, the President of the University put some tickets up for a staff drawing and I was one of the winners.

My friend Alexis and her husband joined my Wife and I for a lot of firsts. We were wandering around outside the fan fest and saw the cheerleaders being thrown into the air. And there was Brutus Buckeye. Alexis had gumption and wanted a picture with the legendary mascot. I joined her.

I love mascots and can now cross a picture with Brutus off the list. We got into St. John Arena and watched the marching band do their skull session. A pep rally of sorts.

The band members in red are the alumni band, who had a reunion this weekend. Over 700 members took part today, more on that in a bit.

C-Deck of Ohio Stadium has 41 rows. We were in row 41. There were a lot of stairs to climb. Jokes were made. Who needs binoculars when we can summon the Hubble! We did find our seats without the need of a Sherpa.

There was nothing behind us but a concrete wall. I climbed on our seat and looked over the top of the stadium. Here's the view. 

Bought a Coke, the label was very ironic considering the firing of OSU Marching Band Director, Jon Waters, just a few weeks ago. There are a lot of feelings about this still going around. 

It was my wife's first live football game, she's trying, even with little oxygen. Maybe that's why we're both smiling. 

The background is a concrete wall. The backrest to our seats. At halftime the bands came out and did four Script Ohios. It was rather impressive.

Over 100,000 people were in attendance. That's a city within a city. Sometime in here a half of football was played and Ohio State was totally in control. They were ahead 45-0 at the break and won 66-0. Watching a rout is not much fun so we left after the band played, with many other people. I did take one last picture.

If you look inside the stadium and spot the blue flag on the right, the open space to the lower left of the flag - that is exactly were we were sitting. 

A decade ago

This was in my Live Journal ten years ago. I'm having trouble finding the differences and changes.

"I did find time to write today. About five pages, Most of it's shit, but I wrote, and that's something. Wrote about being a retail drone in america. How it's become so damn hard to make a living being a public servant, and being treated like crap while doing it. The joys of upper level management. The craziness and suicidal urges of employers and small business owners. The sex and drug use. Weird interview questions by the larger companies. Human resources: friend or foe? Smelly customers. Savant customers who can tell you the plot of every friday the 13th movie, but get drunk and lose their kids. Drunken, tenured english professors who come into the store three times a day for quarts of the cheapest vodka in the store.

And the sex and drugs.

But most of it's shit..."

A new day, a new demographic.

A couple of weeks ago I received an application to join the AARP. I threw the letter out.

Today I attended the retirement party for a colleague who was moving on after thirty years. On the elevator up we were asked by another retired colleague when we were retiring. My former supervisor and I both laughed nervously. Times have changed.

I've entered my fifth decade of life on this planet and am trying hard not to focus on the bad stuff that is happening to and around me. Would have liked my Mom to witness her youngest son his this number, but that's not to be.

I have no bucket list because, like relegation, which I understand all too well,  it would only lead to disappointment.

My colleague was honored with some very wonderful speeches. One of which moved me nearly to tears, to have a boss that would inspire such a meaningful speech! Another used pictures to hilarious and poignant effect.

I've only been in the system for fourteen years, I have a way to go before I sleep, if it even happens.

It was announced that Gerry Goffin, one of the finest lyricists ever, died today at the age of 75. Here's one of the great songs he wrote with Carole King. You can watch it HERE.

A pair of twos comes to an end

Today was my last meeting of the Staff Advisory Council at my workplace. I'd been a member of the council for two years and my term was over. It's over.

Today I resigned my position as chair of the Word is Art Stage of the Columbus Arts Festival. The fun was gone and the legwork wore me out. It was a marvelous two year run and great success was achieved. I feel I helped set a standard for excellence in programming events for the stage and believe that it can get much better. I am leaving on an ascent.

I wandered the stacks after the meeting, looked up where the books by the new Poet Laureate were and went to their location on the 10th floor. Sat at a table looking west campus and Ohio Stadium, skimmed through the book. Found a title that inspired me to write about something I have not really written about.

Wrote.

Look, and pay attention

The school nurse left a note in my son's backpack that she was worried about his BMI and suggested he see a doctor immediately. I do not understand how she did not know he has been under the care of a doctor, psychologist and nutritionist for well over a year. Where was she last year when his BMI was off the bottom of the charts instead of in the bottom percentiles?

I wish a prominent person at the Arts Festival had actually talked to me about having more storytellers at the festival instead of blurting out that he heard of a storytelling group in Columbus that was really good. Was it the one that has been performing at the festival for at least the past three years already? Or another prominent local group that had performed the last two years but respectfully declined this year?

Very cranky right now as I updated the software on my work PC this morning, which resulted in the death of my PC. I've taken the rest of the day off, was unable to move up an appointment to get my hair cut today so I have to go all the way back up to Clintonville later this afternoon. Thanks Obama.

I think a one martini lunch is in my future.

Getting me through the repetition of the work day

A step up

It's a rare day when I bring up anything work related here, but after some time, an amount of time that will not be named here, it finally happened.

A promotion!

How I found out was an odd tale of bureaucratic weirdness. I was not expecting a dove release or a singing telegram, but the normal channels would have been nice.

But it is done, and there is some joy within all the sadness and raging.

Thanks for reading.

I'm thinking of Darren now, and how he always was kind when things at my old job did not go well.

And something else I cannot call my Mom about.

Returning to old form

Next week the woman who hired me is retiring after 48 years with the library. Yesterday was the official University celebration of her service. Along with a few others, I was asked if I wanted to say something during the event. I happily accepted the invitation.

The 11th floor of the library was reserved for the event, which is a rather impressive space. A lot of people showed up, which showed the level of respect her colleagues have for her. I was scheduled next to last to speak. One gentleman spoke that after he was hired 24 years ago he found out he only got the job because someone turned it down. The same happened to me!

I babbled for a few moments then pulled out the poem I wrote for the occasion. She loved it. The crowd loved it. Sometimes when you read, and it's going well, you can feel as well as hear the room's reaction - this was one of those moments.

It was an honor to be a part of her celebration. Her experience and knowledge is unparalleled. Her patience and kindness will be greatly missed.

At Writers' Block last night I read a poem I have not read for awhile. A poem with some good energy and, as another newer poet to the night who had not heard the poem before put it, had some "rage."

"I love it when you have rage," He said. "It's righteous."

Been wondering what happened to the poet who wrote that poem four years ago, where he's been, and what I have to do to bring him back.

Cranky in Columbus

The last few weeks, months even, have been a struggle. You can tell my the decreased number of posts here. Schedules have changed, then changed again and it's been frustrating to redevelop any sense of flow. So I'm tired and may be a bit burnt out.

I'm still trying to process one of the neighbor's adult children who noticed the door to my shed open and told me he was going to have to shoot that person before he realized it was me in there. A late afternoon stand someone else's ground west side shooting would have been a blast to cover.

At least I have finally made the calls to get some bids on pruning the tree in the yard that has branches going over their roof, and mine.

After falling asleep about 10:30 last night my son decided to get up at 3AM and stay awake until about six. I was not pleased by his random babblings, humming and various uses of Dora the Explorer dialogue. Ended up having to call into work, again, because of his sleep habits. It's very frustrating, has been for years. I've learned to not go into work sleep deprived because I'm a real pain in the ass to deal with. Might be easier in my current job, but not when I worked the circulation desk in the morning.

Did manage to get him on the bus then fell asleep for a couple of hours. Headed downtown to get some lunch, still in a mean mood but this beer at The Jury Room helped me out a bit.



Downtown looked good on an early autumn day. Columbus made me sit in the Commons and forced some Jeni's down my throat too, I hate when that happens.

No room for cream, but thanks

I'm not on the I Hate Corporate Coffee bandwagon. Do I try to support my local coffee shops? Absolutely. I get my beans from Stauf's and think One Line has the finest cup in the city. Did I like Starbucks' business practices when they were opening shops across from many independent coffee shops in town back in the nineties? Not really, no. But I did not go to them.

That said the Starbucks I go to has very friendly and dedicated staff. When I work early weekend mornings, I frequent one close to my workplace for coffee and a bagel. The people who work there are amazingly cheerful and efficient for being at work at 6:30 on a Sunday. Certainly more perky than I can ever aspire to be, even at mid-day. So I salute the people at the Starbucks on Olentangy River Road.

This morning the store's music was playing this song. Grim subject matter, but energy providing.

Things that are annoying me as the month comes to an end

The toilet that's been leaking for months, we've been waiting on someone to fix it because we'd rather give him the money than someone else.

The electric outlet below the toilet that recently went out, see above.

The starlings that are living under the eaves, I think there are squirrels in there now. Called a pest control service, they'll be here Monday.

My son's doctor called regarding the feeding clinic. She did not leave a return number. I called the number listed in the hospital and got the voice mail of another doctor. We already have an appointment with her next Thursday. Does she not know or remember this?

My son's in a messed up sleep pattern, again. He's a random noise generator which is rather uninspiring at 3AM. Also, getting him to listen to me and fall asleep is a futile effort.

The Mets suck. Their relief pitching is pathetic. Their ability to score runs is non-existant. I feel sorry for Matt Harvey, the next Jerry Koosman. I'd also feel bad for David Wright if the checks start bouncing.

The lawn mower was repaired nicely, but I put the wrong mixture of gas and oil in. Now it takes awhile to start and has little power when it does. The smoke is fun, too.

I have written very little this month, and what I have written is crap. The way to get out there is to do good work, it's not happening here.

Paging and notes for a special fiction collection.

My neighbor's tree is pushing against my fence, causing a disturbing gap. They also leave their puppy and other dogs out late. They bark. It is sad. I have no idea how many dogs they have, or if they, too, keep them chained up in the basement. Other tenants there have done this.

I do not feel like I exist. This is wrong, but it's a feeling I cannot shake as May begins.

Cubicle silence

"How can you laugh when these terrible things are happening around you?" I was asked at work a few days ago.

"Well it's either that, or jail." Was my answer.

When people you love are in the hospital, dealing with death, in relationship woes or have not taken a shit in three days it's stressful. If I was not able to crack wise about it, the alcohol bill would be greater, and my doctor told me to cut my drinking because my blood pressure is high.

I'm grateful that stressors are flipped, it's the other sixteen hours of the day that are freaking me out, not the eight I no longer spend having to deal with the public.

Still, one good martini after my half day of work before vacation is a good idea.

Still, not worrying like Hell while I am out of the country is going to be next to impossible.