Charles and Diana did not make it to 34, either

The dirt from my forearm
has stained this desktop into a work patina
Determined years of rest and sweat with
the advancement of scroll finger arthritis
An occasional twinge of notice
there has been nothing from you
on my screen for half of the hours
our battery wires touched before corrosion set in
The acid in the gorge between us damaged any
traditional thirty year pearl past hope of recovery

Your release of a guillotine curtain was the final act
that slammed down any remaining impressions
of whatever joy I kept in a picture frame
Aftershock fragments bounce over the skyline of the city you left
There’s only absence seen through the side mirror
It’s hard to steer away when my hands hurt
Cannot tell if it’s age or road rage
Sympathies never exchanged
after the deaths of relatives, friends
Now we are separated by light years

You constructed the wall you thought I played hide and seek behind
Blocked me out with the skills of the best defensemen
Of course there will not be a gift to celebrate how naive we were
Did we expect anything less from each other
after all this neglect and decay?
When the officiant’s seeing eye dog barked
in the office we all crammed into
I was not listening, always short sighted
Never smelt the fragrance of lilies
on that day we joked about blind justice

Bring out the Berke Breathed icons

In a world in which I was asked to produce records or be the guy who makes the 12" remixes, the opening horn riff of this song would have been exploited to death.



Or at least used one extra riff during the song. It really grabs you, and it would not have hurt to bring it in one more time.

But what the hell do I know? I'm just a guy who has his bad poetry put on youtube, thanks for reading.

Hollywood Casino, First Friday in March

I was standing in the middle of a casino on the west side of Columbus.
Around me there was screaming from the blackjack tables.
From of joy or sorrow? I was not sure.
Bells and alarms from the slot machines were going off
the way emergency squads respond in large metropolitan areas.
In front of me Sheena Easton was singing Strut



It was her.
All five feet of her
Introduced by a hypeman
Yes, Sheena Easton has a hypeman
who also played the Kenny Rogers role
during We've Got Tonight
Yes, these things actually happened
Sheena Easton stood on a stage in the middle of a casino
two point three miles from my house
sang a medley of songs by Alexander Nevermind
And fit a few lines from The Glamorous Life in her set



My wife was busy playing the nickel slots
during U Got the Look
I moved closer to the stage when Sheena Easton
sang, Almost Over You
There was a tap on my arm
"Are you, Ed?"
a woman asked me
I recognized her as someone I may or may not have had a crush on
during a job I had in a bookstore many years ago.
"Yes." I said
"You worked at Long's. You're name starts with an M?"
I had not seen her since a funeral over a decade earlier
"Stacy."
"Oh, right. This is surreal," I said as fifty three year old Sheena Easton
belted out the high note as best as she could
which was not bad
considering she was singing on a Friday night at a casino on
the west side of Columbus, Ohio.
And Stacy I'm completely over you if I ever had you to be over to begin with
which I did not tell her as she left with a guy I'm guessing was her husband
since we were not introduced
My wife came back
having won ten dollars after starting with two on the penny slots,
while I laughed at Blue Jackets defenseman Nikita Nikitin getting into his first NHL fight on the projection screens over Sheena Easton's head as she sang Sugar Walls.
Ten years ago, none of this was possible
But now, anything is
in a venue without windows, just down the road from our home

Making a forward leap

My favorite park in Columbus, which has several wonderful ones, is Schiller in German Village. It's relatively quiet, has a nice playground and a tennis court for my son to do laps around. I lived down the block from here right after marriage two and really loved the neighborhood.

Even when I did not have a car I liked to come down here and chill. Good place for a picnic. Not sure how it is for first dates though, back in the summer of 1998, it left me a bit dazed.

All I'm saying is that boasting about fellatio skills on a first date is not the best idea, nor is looking for someone whose lap you can sit on and call him Daddy. After being out of the dating scene, first one back out of the gate was a theater major. My kryptonite. That was my fault for not recognizing the sign of the Drama, among other things.



Nothing happened. It was all for the best. Big River was being performed by the Actor's Summer Theater that night. I think she's tried to find me on MyLife. I'm not hard to find.

A few months later, on the day of my first divorce, I burned the marriage license and gave it a Viking funeral in the pond. What the Hell is it about me and silly rituals?

Rest you well

On Saturday I was bringing my son home from swimming. Down the road I noticed some emergency vehicles near my ex mother in law's house. I thought there was an accident on the corner, but when I got closer I saw they were in front of her house. There was a paramedic in her front doorway, which was also open. That door is rarely open, so something was up.

I called L. and told her. She had not heard anything. I'm guessing she went right over there and I did not hear back from her until that evening.

She told me her mother had a ruptured brain aneurysm, and the prognosis was poor. This morning she let me know the doctors declared her brain dead yesterday afternoon.

I feel horrible for her, her brother and the rest of her family. She loved all of them and was equally loved back. She and I ended badly and had not spoken for over four years. Life's to short to keep those grudges, right? I wish everyone peace.

I do not know what to tell my son, what will register with him? I told him to think good thoughts about her on Saturday. But now what?

Release of the Dead

This is from the last Spliz Enz album, which was never officially released in the U.S. It did get recorded on the first Crowded House album. I've probably posted it here before, but it's in my head now and needs a release into the blogosphere.

Had a very disturbing dream over the weekend. I was working at the cash register at Long's, a college bookstore and Ohio State merchandise emporium I came to despise working at in the late 90's. A group came to the register and had a number of expensive items to purchase. They all spread out at at some signal they all rushed me, got the register open and robbed the place. Next in the dream was another person trying to rob me, again. This time I had a heavy piece of glass Block-O thing in my hands and bashed the guy in the head, repeatedly. I work up with a start. Very upsetting dream.

In the midst of writing a short, nasty thing. You hear about people reclaiming their virginity, to mixed results. My question is can you unsleep with someone? If you can 'wash that man right out of your hair' can you kick someone out of your bed?

Probably not, but you wonder what you were thinking, too much I suppose. So I kick myself, again and again. This isn't about erasing the past, an Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind thing. Simply trying to write through a flood.

My brain needs a dehumidifier.

A Red Light on West Mound Street

This morning while driving to work I was stopped at a light less than half a mile from my home. In the rear view mirror I saw a car pull up behind me that looked very familiar.

It was the car that hit me in December. The Mustang had very distinctive striping and a vanity plate. I let the car pass me to confirm, and it was her – in a repaired vehicle

We were going the same route, to I-70 East, to 315 North, past the same spot where the collision took place.

I kept my distance, and watched out for white SUVs. I bear her no ill will.

Over Fifty Pounds Ago

Today marks what would have been Prince Charles and Lady Diana's 29th wedding anniversary. This date would have also been the 25th wedding anniversary with my first wife.

Hindsight offers a lot of opportunities at excuses and what ifs, but it happened and cannot be changed. She and I are, by her choice, no longer on speaking terms. This day finds me thinking in terms of rituals that probably have no real meaning. So finding a narrow part of the Scioto River to throw a tarnished piece of silver across is of mixed metaphor and a pathetic stunt at best. Closure is a myth.



Last night was another IWPS qualifying slam at Writers' Block. Twelve poets took part and round one was close. I'm not sure if I was tied for seventh, eighth, or ninth. All I knew is that I was going 11th in round two. The one minute round.

One minute poems are a necessary evil of slam. Every slammer worth their salt onstage should have a few of them to rely on. It's like learning trigonometry in high school. As the teacher said, "You never know when you're going to need it on the Subway."

Such is the one minute poem. It's tough. It's quick. But it's a tool the good poet needs.

Scores in round two were once again weirdly consistent, and very tight. Had a feeling I could jump up the ladder with a high score. Did a poem I've been holding onto for this moment. It was inspired by an item in a friend's memory box, and essentially wrote itself in a thread on Live Journal. Went up and did it. Knocked it out well enough to get the highest score of the night (29.2) and vaulted up the standings like Beamon at the '68 Olympics to finish in second place.

All I'll say is that the poem is related to the image above and that I have forever changed the way many people in Kafe Kerouac think about said image.

Congratulations to Dain for winning the slam and Atticus for coming in third. Hot action all around!